Once upon a time there was a man who wanted to live in a tower. So he decided to grow his own.

He first tested his growth serum on a human subject, as you must always do with these sorts of things. It worked. The subject grew as tall and skinny as anyone you’ve ever seen. He would make the perfect butler for the tower, the man decided.

He then crafted the first brick that would serve as the seed and planted it in the soil. It took root, and soon the house began to spring up. The man was then called away on other business and went on to have many an adventure. But that is a tale for another time.

Meanwhile, the tower kept growing. It developed a mind of its own. And over time, it attracted a most curious set of occupants.

And now for the first time, the only living tower in the world is throwing open its doors! Meet the six hundred year old butler who has just published his memoirs! Assist the celebrity nutritionist as he feeds the tower its lunch! And have tea with the imprisoned princess at the top of the tower who has been woken up and dusted off just for your visit!